This month has been quite busy.
I was discharged off my section.
I was able to spend my day with my dad on his 50th birthday. I'm so glad it was such a special day. I got a photo with him and it makes me so happy when I look at it.
Yesterday I did a lot of walking.
I have been gaining a lot of weight basically a pound a day, which I've put down too the changes in my medication. I've been eating and exercising the same. Until now.
Im trying to get a lot more exercise done and calories burnt. I think it's paying off because I lost weight this morning. I need to continue to loose this weight.
The rest of the month I plan to do an online course and try to feel better mentally. I feel I'm not always here. I can't remember what I'm doing sometimes, but hopefully I will be okay.
I'm struggling but this isn't all about me. It's about you lovely people? How are things? Xxxx
Here with my family on the weekend be for my dads 50th. There having a BBQ. I don’t normally go to things with my family, this is why.
I sit down they all way away, you offer to help and get moaned at and try to join in conversation but just don’t click.
They always message me saying they want to be envolved but they just can’t handle me, or my illnesses.
I’m very alone.
I’m really anxious I will admit, I’ve also just got the day for my tribunal, it’s next week, I hope I’m discharged today. That would be amazing, I definitely feel ready to get out of here. Wish me luck.
I don’t think I purposely trigger myself but if a song comes on I know I have a bad attachment to it I might not change to the next song, even though it makes me feel really bad.
Maybe I feel I don’t deserve to have enjoyed the song just before that one, or maybe I need to unconsciously ground myself by feeling different emotions.
That’s my view on listening to a song I know will make myself feel bad.
So I’ve got 62 days which in my head doesn’t sound a lot it makes me think about every little choice I’m making about food and drink.
Current I’m in an acute mental health ward, after completely loosing touch with life. I will admit now that I’m on the right medication I can see how things are and it’s pretty scary. I’m sectioned under section 2 of the mental health act. I still have 16 days on my section, but I’m hoping I will have my tribunal really soon so I can get out of here.
I’ve learnt my lesson don’t stop or mess around with medication.
Anyway back to the weight loss plan…
Well I don’t really have one. I don’t know what I should do, should I follow my own diet plan? Or something like slimming world, I really have no idea.
Any help appreciated.
What I do know I’m going to do.
- Medication correctly everyday,
- Caffeine products,
- Low kcal or no kcal drinks,
- Drink at least two litres everyday,
- Aim 10, 000 steps a day, which is difficult in a small ward,
- I’m not aiming to starve myself, but I know I need to eat less than I burn,
- When I get out of here gym three times a week,
- Try to eat as healthy as possible,
- Weigh myself once a week I think Fridays.
Any other suggestions please help me, I’m aiming to loose a lot of weight.