angry · Anxiety · Dad · Emotions · family · Lonely · Mental health · Mum · self harm · Sisters

More bad news. 

So after my mum saying I couldn’t watch my youngest sister first go karting session. Which up set me enough.

The next sister up blocked me on Facebook again, this time because I put that I went to hospital. So that’s made me feel upset, so I deactivated my account. I think I did it to kinda get back at her and others. Especially as she has now sent me a text which it looks like she has had a lot of help to write from mum and probably my next sister up. 

I feel I can’t do anything right, I want to spend time with them and support them but they don’t give me the opportunitys too, but then moan at me for not.

I don’t think have a clue what I go through each day, they are only able to think of them selves which does hurt me. 

I feel like the sister down from me who’s two years younger, ismums perfect child, she is married, baby on the way, and lets mum still control her life. She is always Over our parents house, but that’s her personal choice. I put this sister through a lot and I feel so guilty about this. She was there crying every time I harmed or overdosed, what kind of a big sister does that make me. I really hope she knows I’m sorry. 

I love them all so much, and wish I was a part of there lives more than I am, but reality, I’m not. 

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