I feel so rubbish really suicidal, really scared, and really like I can’t do this anymore.
Life is too much.
I’m constantly scared and worked up. I wish I didn’t have deal with any of this.
I’m a failure I’m callied my doctor. And my cpn, and luckily there not there or too busy. So I can be completely alone and not tell them how I’m really feeling, this is the best option, everything happens for a reason. Do the fact I can’t speak to them, tells me I shouldn’t. I should keep this to myself and finish the job.