I’ve had a few blood transfusions now but the first one was so terrifying and I was so scared.
I had been sectioned and taken to a acute psychiatric ward, but they soon realised my hb (heamaglobin) levels were too low. They wouldn’t let me move any where with out a few staff members because I was so ill I was at high risk of dying.
I remember the night I was admitted I looked to the sky and saw three shooting stars. I had never seen one before I was so excited I want to tell someone but no one was around as it was 3am.
Any way the next morning the staff came in and told me I’m being transferred to a medical hospital. My heamaglobin was so low they were amazed I was still alive.
I was checked over and immediately admitted and told I needed a blood transfusion. I refused. They explained if I wouldn’t accept it and let them give me it they would do it with out my permission as I was still sectioned under section 2. This meant that because it was in my best interest I couldn’t say no to the transfusion. I tried all sorts of things to get out of it, messing around with the canulas i had in. Thinking if I took them out they couldn’t give me blood, saying it’s against my religion, and all kind of things.
It took hours and hours of my carer trying to convince me to let them do it, I was also constantly supervised by a member of staff from the psychiatric unit as I was still on suicide watch.
Anyway hours later I agreed to it. Kind of. I said yes but then when they brought the blood in the bag in, I freaked out a bit, my carer had to hold my arm down so they could connect the blood, as I saw it going on to my veins I was so scared.
This was some one else’s blood going inside me, I also felt I didn’t deserve the blood as my blood levels were so low because of my self harm. I think people who give blood should mean the blood goes to some one worthy of it and I didn’t feel that was me.
After the first 15 minutes they came to do the checks to see if your having a reaction to it, and I was my temperature had gone up so they stopped the blood going in and game me some medication to bring down my temperature. They then checked on me again and as my temperature had gone down restarted the blood. Which was really scary again. I had to have four units of blood.
I didn’t learn my lesson though since then I’ve had more blood transfusions, but I haven’t had one for a year (I think). So that’s progress.