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Where am I heading?

I’m not really sure, but this post will contain talk about weight, self harm and unhealthy habits/thoughts.

First of all my harming is making my physical health decline and pretty quickly, my heamaglobin is currently at 8.7 and under 11.5 is anemic. But I know I was told if it goes under 7 then a mental health act assessment will be called. But when I spoke to my cpn and gp last week they both said it’s up to the each other, no one would take responsibility. I asked my cpn what consequences is there if I keep harming and she said what do you think I said ” I’d die” and she said yep pretty much. So now I’m left with the choice to continue and risks mental health act assessment or take iron supplements and get better?

My weight is pretty stable at the moment my bmi Is pretty much in the middle of healthy weight. I’m not happy it staying there, but I need to put the effort in and make the conscious choice of getting to my goal weight. I need to think in to detail of how I’m going to get it where I want it and how? I also need to think about what happens if it doesnt go to plan?

At the minute I’m pretty stable on my medication, it is being changed in the next few weeks again but I want this change. It’s from diazepam to pregabline, I’ve been on diazepam over two years, and no longer find it helpful, just take it for the sake of it. 

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